How To Resolve the Unresolvable {Building Marriage}

Marriage Tips //Building A Stronger Marriage // Huntsville Wedding Photographers

Those pesky battles…

Do you feel like you keep fighting the same battle over and over again?

Every marriage has some sore spots. Those little conflicts that are never really resolved. Sometimes they’re insignificant, and sometimes they go deep into your relationship.

One of our sore spots is scrolling through the GPS route while driving. (Eyes on the road! says one. They are on the road! says the other…) Another one is assuming the negative before the positive, followed by a complete stress-fest. And leaving dirty lunch containers on the counter? Let’s not talk about it.

TMI?

Now that you’ve had an inside peek into some of our silliest arguments, I want to talk about finding a way to resolve some of those issues when what you’ve tried before just isn’t working.

We’re fans of Gary Chapman’s book, “The Five Love Languages”. One of the ways it’s impacted our marriage is by opening our eyes to the fact that we are two completely different people. What makes sense to me doesn’t necessary make sense to Joel. The way I think and analyze is usually different from how Joel handles a situation.

Do you and your spouse have different ways of thinking, reacting, and taking action?

If you’ve tried to resolve a “sore spot” in the past without result, try using an approach that’s truly respectful of your spouse’s needs and personality.

For example, some people think analytically (Joel), and some think emotionally (Amber). So when an emotional person tries to change an analytical person’s actions using emotional arguments, it doesn’t usually work.

I’m a lot more loving in my efforts toward resolution if I pay attention to what Joel needs. He’ll be able to talk through logical reasoning easier than an outpour of emotional stress.

And while I need to re-hash and re-hash a topic before I can find closure, Joel doesn’t. He gets frustrated when the subject can’t drop.

And so by learning how you can approach your spouse in a way that shows them respect for their personalities and needs, you have the ability to get much more resolution on an issue than if you just do it your way.

How are you going to make it happen?

Think about a silly little ongoing issue with your spouse that you just can’t seem to resolve. How does he or she best work through problems? Come up with a way you can find resolution by trading “your way” for “their way”.

Here’s to building stronger marriages and not leaving lunch containers on the counter.

*hugs*

Amber

{Want more? We’ve got some Mochas talking about The Secret To A Happy Marriage and your permission to Be Fierce.}