The Dress Shopping Experience: How To Handle All The Advice

The day is here.

Dress. Shopping. Day!

I remember the day I came home with my wedding dress. All of a sudden, I felt like this wedding thing was really happening. When I closed my eyes, I could start to picture it – and it was so real. It’s an amazing experience, that dress shopping day!

But you know how sometimes reality comes at your dreams full force like a cold dash of water?

Mom loves an A-line, grandma thinks that lace is simply the way to go, your maid of honor can’t imagine you in anything but a BHLDN gown. You just feel like you’ll know it when you see it.

Who’s supposed to come with you on your Great Dress Experience? Even more importantly, how do you handle all those different opinions from ladies that you love and adore? :)

1. Who gets to come?

That question is really up to you! Some brides just want her mom and sisters. Other girls want the full collection of bridesmaids, plus mom and grandma, plus the wedding planner! Two things to remember: the more people you bring, the more opinions you’re going to get. Some of you might love all the help; others might feel the pressure of keeping everybody happy.

Think about whose opinions you really do want to have and invite them along!

2. What about everybody else?

Won’t there be some hurt feelings if I don’t take my grandma and sisters – I love them, but their taste is so much different than mine!

If you have a whole group that wants to be a part of the experience and you don’t have the heart to say no, invite them on an initial dress exploration trip. Try on some dresses, get their opinions, and have fun! You don’t necessarily have to purchase a dress on that first trip, so let them feel like part of the process and just enjoy spending the time with your favorite girls!

3. Standing your ground gracefully with a gentle “no”.

For every person you bring with you, there will probably be a different opinion. How to handle it? Be emotionally prepared to stand your ground gracefully.

Know that you might have to say “Aw, grandma! That’s so neat that your wedding dress had lace! I always loved looking at your wedding picture hanging on the wall. I hope I will look as radiant and beautiful as you did on your wedding day! I’m not sure I’m loving these lace dresses, though. Maybe this style just isn’t for me! I’ll keep it in mind and take a look at all the options before deciding.”

“Mom, you’re making me tear up! It means so much to me that you think I’m the most beautiful woman in the world while I’m wearing this dress. I always thought I’d know it right away when I found “the dress”, so I’m going to keep looking just a little bit longer! I’m just not sure I feel the magic in this dress, but I know where to find this dress if I change my mind!”

“Christi, we’re bffs for a reason! You get me like nobody else does! So you really don’t think this dress is the one? I feel like a princess and I totally see myself wearing this dress when I picture the perfect wedding day in my head. Do you think that once we pair with my bouquet and all those gorgeous bridal accessories it will look a little bit more like you imaged it should look? I think this dress is The One and I’m getting so excited about it!”

If you want the space to decide for yourself, do an initial “I’m just looking” shopping session with the whole group. Go back a second time with one or two people that you really want to bring with you and make your final selection there without all the pressure. You’ll have both the advice from  your group of girls and the freedom to make a decision yourself – double win! :)

There’s not really a right way or a wrong way to enjoy the dress shopping experience. Decide what’s right for you, and soak in those memories!

*hugs*

Amber

Funny story!! Joel was living in Alabama and I was in eastern North Carolina while we were planning our wedding. Joel came out to visit for a few days, and we had gone to Greenville (the closest “big shopping” we have out there!) with my mom, my sister, and my grandma. I hadn’t planned on going wedding dress shopping at all that day, but we ended up running into the store to make a dress shopping appointment. We left Joel in the car, armed with whatever game he had on his flip phone at that time. (Back in 2009, iPhones weren’t as much of a thing. Imagine that?!)

An impromptu dress trying-on session and 20 minutes later, I came out carrying my wedding dress! Joel rode the whole way home not being allowed to see the dress hiding in the trunk. It was totally unplanned, but I had my 3 most important girls with me and the 3rd dress I tried on ended up being “The One”. I kind of missed having the official Big Dress Shopping experience by accident, but I wouldn’t trade these memories for anything!